She Writes Good

The Liebster Award 2019 Nomination

Questions to Me

1. How do you want people to remember you or what would you want to be your legacy?
2. Tell me what your perfect dream day would be.
3. What is your biggest hope for 2019?
4. Who would be your hero and why?
5. What is one fact about you that not very many people know?
6. Who inspires you the most in your life?
7. If you could change one thing about the past, what would it be?
8. Tell me the greatest lesson you have learned in your life so far and what advice would you give somebody because of that?
9. Do you prefer the morning or the evening and why?
10. What is your favorite quote and why?

My Answers

I’m usually not so hot on using the Q&A format in my writing. It stirs up unpleasant memories of my subpar school paper interview of Mr. Wood, my 7th grade science teacher. So if you don’t mind, I’ll be answering these questions in paragraph form.

I don’t think leaving a legacy applies to me. I’m not an Ivy League school, a sensible sedan, or the eternal words of a blind bard. My husband and I have only seriously started building our assets in the past four years, so there’s not much to speak of there either. My expectation is that memories of me are limited to those who have known me within my lifetime, and I think I’ve accepted that. I’d like to be remembered as someone who makes some darn tasty baked goods, is a thoughtful friend, a hard worker with positive contributions, and a source of quiet joy. It would make me endlessly happy to know that people smile at the thought of me. I’d also like to be known as someone whose perfect dream day starts by waking up early and feeling completely rested. I will have discovered a way to visit friends, happy memories, and favorite places at my leisure. I’d get moderate exercise that makes me feel encouraged about my physical health. I will have a perfect steak and a nice wine that will leave me with no hangover. I will feel as though I have completely devoted my attention to my daughter and will not feel a sliver of mom guilt at any time. If I need to be more realistic, then take out the teleportation and time travel, but keep the rest, especially the no guilt part.

2018 was a year of change. Despite having a good routine and a wonderful social network in the San Francisco Bay Area, we felt a desire to move closer to family. We struggled mightily over the decision, and I turned down a few big opportunities to move closer to my parents on California’s central coast. I have not found peace in this move yet, so my biggest hope for 2019 is that I do. I find myself wondering what my hero would do. Frankly I don’t have one singular person I look up to. I guess that makes my hero an amalgam of all those who inspired me in some way. My best friend from college is heroic in her pragmatism and conviction. My grandma was heroic in her ability to never get emotionally ruffled. Mr. Rogers was heroic in the serene way he taught children about tolerance and self-love. My childhood next door neighbor was heroic in the way he was never embarrassed that the entire neighborhood could hear his loud sneezes.

A fun fact that I don’t often share is that I bought a book entitled something like “How To Be Popular” from the back of Teen Magazine when I was a freshman in high school. I really wanted to elevate my status of just saying hello to Katie something-or-other in the halls to being part of her posse. The book was underwhelming, as was my quest for popularity. However, there are a few tips that I remember from it that I still practice to this day. Those are to be nice, and to compliment people. So I try to compliment those who inspire me. I already mentioned some of my heroes above, but my dad inspires me a lot. He’s 89 years old and in better shape than me. He is a voracious reader, smart as a whip, and pretty darn funny. He still works, but only part-time. Despite my emotional turmoil over moving, I am glad I get to spend more time with him now.

I try not to jump in the rabbit hole of regret. It drops off quickly and is a bear to climb out. But there are some things I wish I could change about my past. I wish I would have more seriously considered the consequences of my actions. I went through a particularly rough period during and right after college that involved a very toxic relationship, far too much drinking, and extremely poor academic performance. I learned a lot from it all, despite having lingered too long when I should have exited stage left. I learned two big lessons from that time:

1. Work on your emotional strength and confidence before entering a relationship. Know your rights and stand by them.

2. Have as much fun as you want, but try to keep that fun outside the ink of a permanent record. Academic transcripts, driving records, and other easily-retrievable information from the court system should reflect a life lived on the straight-and-narrow. You can certainly do drunk karaoke until 4 am in Manhattan, but keep that information limited to only those you want to know about it.

When I started to write my first book (still in the works), I hit a real hurdle from the outset. I wanted the chapter to open just before sunrise. The problem is, I couldn’t wake up early enough to create an accurate description. Based on this, you can take an easy gander that I like evenings more. I did enjoy being up early the six times I was able to do it, but I think I’m naturally a night owl. And speaking of owls, one of the quotes I’ve always appreciated for its simple wisdom is:

“You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true. You may have to work for it, however.”

– Richard Bach

My Nominees and Their Questions

My nominees’ sites and Twitter handles are:

The Bookish Momma, @thebookishmomma 
Four Parts Mom, @fourpartsmom 
Sincere Mommy, @SincereMommy2 
Corporate to Kids, @CorporatetoKids 
Been There With Kids, @CrystalsTravels 
The Curious Frugal, @thecuriousfrugal (Facebook)
FibroMomBlog, @blog_fibro
Mother Haggard, @MotherHaggard 
Soph Hearts, @sophhearts
Mascara & Marigolds, @marandajoyr 

Their questions are:

1. Have you ever used a pay phone and if so, tell the story of the last time you did.
2. When was a time you were proud of yourself for being brave?
3. When was a time you were proud of yourself for being kind?
4. When was a time you were proud of yourself for being smart?
5. Do you decorate your house for holidays or other other seasonal celebrations?
6. What is the weirdest thing someone has said to you?
7. When was a time that nature took your breath away?
8. Name one place on your travel bucket list and why.
9. What is your favorite restaurant?
10. What did you want to be when you grew up, and did you do it?
11. How are you involved in your community?

 

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